Ask Annie

Mar. 15, 2006

Dear Annie,

I am in my late twenties and have held a close friendship with a girl that I have know for over 14 years. We both have taken considerably different paths in life. The difference in our life choices have never presented a problem for me. However, now we are not speaking, and have not spoken for a couple months. This is a result of her calling my home in the wee hours of the morning, Drunk! My husband answered the phone and some unpleasantries were exchanged. Neither of the two care for one another and never have. They both have been outspoken on this. I have tried not to take sides, but I obviously would side with my husband. I love him very much. He treats me awesome and we really enjoy being together. I care for her very much and she also has three children that I care for very much. My husband and I have been married for only a year and in that year my relationship with my best friend steadily declined. Is there anything I can do to repair the damage and to get them to call a truce?

Not Speaking

Dear Not Speaking,

You can’t manipulate their feelings toward each other, but you can tell them how it affects you. They may be more open to changing their behavior when they know how much it hurts you. Sit down with your husband and, together, set boundaries for your friend. What do you both need her to do so you can visit with her and he can tolerate her? Asking her not to call while she’s drinking and to call during waking hours is a good start. Above all, pray. God will help you, your friend, her children, and your husband. Ask Him.

Annie

 

Please write to:

Annie, P.O. Box 1084, Eatonville,WA 98328

E-mail: letters_annie@hotmail.com

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